Do You Give Clients Holiday Gifts?

I have shared this with an online chat group and got poo pooed so sticking my neck out to share it again. I have been a PDMM for oooo about 5+ years and a DMM for over double that. I am a Mom of 5 kids who are all in scouts so we have popcorn and cookies to sell galore. Girl Scouts sell a cookie called the Thanks-a-lot. It is a shortbread cookie with a chocolate back layer. Each cookie is stamped (indented) with thank you in different languages on each cookie in the pack. I have clients of all nationalities so they really enjoy these cookies. So to support girl scouts, my daughters and to bring a smile to my client’s face, I purchase cases of the thanks-a-lot cookies and wrap them. I give one to each client and support staff that help my clients every December (timing dependent on their religion). A few clients have said that now that they are in assisted living they never get to buy girl scout cookies or popcorn or things like that and they miss it.
So a $4 box of cookies is WELL below the IRS gifting limit and it is not given with the expectation of something in return. I let my clients know that I will not accept gifts from them as that is unethical to me. Many don’t like that but I am firm. I’m not really good at getting gifts anyway, much rather be the giver! I am not using this gift to obtain a kickback and do not expect anything in return other than seeing the joy on their faces at getting a treat.
I have been asked to be on a referral system with financial advisors which would pay me to bring them clients. I refuse to do as that is against our code of ethics – unless disclosed in writing – and just feels wrong. I have had online chat people say giving the cookies to a client is breach of the code of ethics and that they would never gift anyone. I believe once this person starts to obtain DMM clients they will see there is a difference between giving a gift with the expectation of getting something in return and giving a gift to say Thanks-a-lot. I also believe once they really read the code of ethics, they will see there isn’t a line that says you can’t give gifts.
To me, by not accepting gifts, it helps to keep in line with “DMMs shall avoid activities that interfere with professional judgement and objectivity”. I can give a gift to all to show my appreciation and bring me joy of the season (yes, it is all about me!). That doesn’t affect my objectivity or judgment as everyone is getting a box of cookies so it is equal. Everyone is NOT giving a gift which can be weighed and measured against another client which could sku objectivity.
That’s my opinion for what it is worth.
Cindy

Cindy B. Stevens BS, PDMM®, CSA®
Personal Financial Solutions

I don’t give gifts, but love Cindy’s idea to do the girl scout cookies, which is also a wonderful modeling for kids! Caitlin’s thoughtfulness to send gifts to her clients based on what they may like is another option (this is particularly in line with her high net worth clients).

For me, it’s an ethical issue because I don’t want clients to worry about getting a gift for me or wondering what to do around holidays.

I also don’t want the extra burden of figuring out what to give clients, so in some ways it’s about self care for me. I don’t enjoy buying stuff and don’t like shopping either. I’m a real Scrooge 🙂

As a clinical social worker, in order to maintain my license I need to get 4 hours of ethics and boundaries training every 2 years and have done so since 1975. Social workers often talk about why they make decisions that may cross a boundary, and we refer to these as boundary crossings (more of the gray areas) which are different from boundary violations (very specifically spelled out). If there is a boundary crossing, one needs to ask what is the rationale and does it stand up to the “reasonable standard”. If there is a question, it should be discussed in consultation with other experienced professionals. I love this forum for that exact reason and appreciate the DMMs who responded!

Barbara Boustead
barbara@marysdaughterllc.com

I give gifts to my referral sources, and not my actual clients. My referral sources are usually attorneys, tax professionals, bookkeepers and those who work in the senior community. For Attorneys I usually give wine or coffee during the holidays, and for bookkeepers and tax professionals I give donuts during tax season. For my clients, I usually just send birthday cards or holiday cards during the year, showing that I am thinking about them. However, I don’t want gifts back from them especially from many elderly clients, as mentioned by others which could have ethical implications. Also, I don’t know what my high net-worth clients want that they already don’t buy for themselves.